I said I'd come back to it - here I am.

Sythesizing Happiness.
That's the basic idea of the next video I watched. This one was awesome. Dan Gilbert said that his studies have shown that people will increase happiness about a choice they made and increase dislike for the choice they left behind.

Even tested on Amnesiacs: "arrange these items best to worst, 1,2,3,4,5,6". Then give them a choice to keep either their 3rd or 4th fav and "we'll mail it to you". They choose the 3rd fav. Ask them again in 30 min when they have NO memory of you at all, best to worst 1,2,3,4,5,6? The one they chose (3rd fav) they now list as their 2nd fav. Their old 4th fav, the one they choose to not have, is now 5th.
----Their feelings of happiness about that item increased, even though they have no memory of choosing it.

So--- what he's saying is that once we make a choice, we back ourselves up - talk ourselves into it. And at the same time we talk down the option we left behind. I've seen this 100 times when matt or I apply for jobs. "This job would be perfect, for reasons innumerable" then we get a no answer and we start to focus on the reasons we "knew it wasn't a good idea anyway". I always thought it was a juvenille tendancy. But according to Dan it's an emotional immune system. :)

He says that synthesizing happiness works best in final choices. No refund policy on the shoes, vs a 4 day return policy. Makes sense. Cool that we have a natural and unconscious ability to make ourselves happy. Developing that skill would be smart.